Sunday, April 29th, 2007
I was looking back at our family photos recently.
Pictures of the boys when they were small. M sitting on a blanket under the fruit trees at the end of our garden, his face lit up with a smile as he plays with the colourful plastic toys surrounding him.
S at the same age with the blank stare of the child with autism, resolutely ignoring both people and toys. Children with autism have no imagination, so very limited play skills. They often only approach people as a means of getting what they want. Some do not even recognise their parents.
Yet they can change. As he grows older, we see pictures of S smiling broadly at the camera…a short phase, like most boys he now hates to have his picture taken! He can play, in a limited fashion, with things which interest him…these usually involve music and technology. He has a smile which melts the hardest heart and gets him his own way far more often than is good for him. He has even learned to say please using Makaton sign language in his own idiosyncratic way…he blows us a kiss.
Posted in A Parallel Universe | No Comments »
Sunday, April 29th, 2007
"Ye gods" (Sorry Anne, I’ve pinched this line from you!), but I have never been so glad of a party finishing as I was yesterday.
I have always taken such pride from producing great parties at home for the children (this is measured by my children’s enjoyment factor and that their friends have always been reluctant to leave).
Maybe it has something to do with how I’ve been feeling lately (stressed) but I couldn’t believe the behaviour of some of the children and they all around the age of six! And to be honest, it was the girls that were the problem.
We had our customary bouncy castle and although I didn’t go to town on the games like I normally do I had some up my sleeve to keep them occupied. Plus I always have a craft table for them to make things. It’s usually the girls that like this but it has always been a hit. Especially as one of my friends took over as ‘Creative Director’.
It started within the first half an hour. The girls were pinning the boys down on the bouncy castle. But you know when you can see that although the boys ddn’t want to make too much fuss, they really were struggling. I found myself having to ‘have a word’ with the girls over not being so rough!
This was just the start. I made sure an adult was watching out for me while I carried on with the background preparations and if an adult had to tell them once they told them about four times. So I know it wasn’t just me.
I know at parties maybe one child can get upset over something, but I had four children, who at one time or another got upset by being hurt. And I have to say it’s something else I’ve prided myself on that children don’t get upset (apart from the odd one and that’s over the last few years!).
The organised games were fine, but even then, it was a case of some of the children, just saying "I don’t want to play that" and not in the polite ‘no thanks’ kind of way either.
Don’t get me wrong most of these children are lovely in their own right, but, especially with the girls, they were displaying traits that you don’t normally see until they are teenagers. My friend summed it up, girls are fine until they ‘get into packs’.
And at the end of the day as they were leaving, it was a case of (with the girls) ‘where’s my party bag?’. I can’t repeat how I would have liked to answer those questions, but I’m sure you can imagine.
I have to do it all over again in two weeks for my soon to be 10 year old. But even last year with his (then) 9 year old girl friends talking about sex all the time, the six year olds beat them hands down!
Posted in General | 4 Comments »