With Friends Like These . . .

Now I love my sister, there’s no denying that.  But you know, you really can go off people when you’re busy doing all the usual mundane jobs when you get a text like this . . .

"Hey sitting in Monaco sipping champagne overlooking the port with very very big boats eating pizza . . . what you doing?"

For the flippant amongst us (not me of course) you could say "I didn’t know boats ate pizza", but that is childish.

If this wasn’t bad enough a day or two later I received this text.

"Sitting in bed with cuppa waiting to have croissants and then day on the lilo at the beach close to a bar . . . what u doing?"

Wait, it gets better.  The next one read . .

"Sunning on lounge on beach drinking a ’sex on the beach’  cocktail after having full body massage on beach waiting for my grilled sea bass served on the beach at a table under umbrella on the French Riviera . . what you doing?"

And finally . .

"One last brag b4i leave 4 Greece . . . On the lilo on the beach with the cocktail cooking in the sun",

followed shortly after by

"Last night at Nice dining at Casino Palais de la Mediterranee all jolly and full of food"

Yeah, right thanks I’ll carry on with the ironing and cleaning then shall I? 

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There’s No Flies on Me!

A friend’s daughter who is 3 years old was taken out for the day by her Grandma.

The little girl had asked to go to McDonalds, but had fallen asleep over the lunch time.  When she woke up later on she asked if they were going to McDonalds, to which Grandma, who didn’t want to upset her said "oh they were closed darling, they’re decorating", which was obviously a little white lie.

This appeased the little girl and all was fine.

The next day Grandma decided to make up for the day before and took her granddaughter to McDonalds for lunch.  As they queued to get their food, the little girl looked around her, turned to her Grandma and whispered "they haven’t done much decorating have they Grandma?"

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